Tuesday, August 14, 2012

TMI Tuesday - No Regrets.



Looking back on our lives, we can have a mix of reactions to the things we’ve done. When it comes to sex, our memories can color us with pride, fondness, nostalgia, indifference, or all too often, regret.
This week’s TMI Tuesday questions delve into things that people typically regret later in life. How much do you regret, if at all, any of the following?

Remember as always for more confessions check out the entries at TMI Tuesday .

Jake's Answers:

1. Do you regret how you "lost" your virginity? If yes why and to whom would you have preferred to have lost it?
No I don't have any regrets. I probably could have chosen someone better but she was the one who was there at the time. Everything happens for a reason. It is pretty bad that I can't even remember her name.

2. Have you ever lived a moment in your life where you said "Yeh, I'm not going to ever tell anyone about that." Describe that moment or incident.
I once went out with a girl and it wasn't really working for me so I ended up sleeping with her mother. It wasn't something I wanted to spread around or admit to at the time.

3. Do you regret having acted on a sexual impulse? If yes, please describe.
Not yet but I am sure it will happen one day.


4. Do you regret NOT having had sex with someone who you could have had sex with? If yes would you do it over and have sex?
Yes and yes. I can't remember names, places or other details. I was not as quick on the uptake when I was younger so there were probably many women who were interested in me if only I had realised.
I was just thinking about this some more. I am certain that we have been at swinger's clubs and been too shy / cautious to approach a couple who would not have said no. We are still learning the cues with this and being reserved people sometimes miss opportunity.

5. Do you regret not having asked or tried to hook up with someone you really liked out of fear of rejection only to later learn that person wanted you too? If yes, please describe.
I can't think of any. There is a lady I am interested in at the moment who is unaware of our lifestyle. I am unsure of how she sees me so maybe that will turn out that way in the future. You can't really regret a situation if you act on the information that you have at the time so if I was unaware of someone liking me then I can't regret not acting. If I were to know about their feelings and DIDN'T act then that would be another thing entirely.

6. Do you regret having done a particular sex act? If yes please describe.
No. How can you regret a sexual act if you were trying it for the first time? At least if you try it and it doesn't work out you can say you have had the experience of trying it. I have been lucky so far that I haven't had the opportunity to try something that I turned out not to like.

Bonus: Do you regret not having told someone you love them? Romantic not, familial or friendship love.
No.

  

Gemma's Answers:

1. Do you regret how you "lost" your virginity? If yes why and to whom would you have preferred to have lost it?In a lot of ways I do regret the way I lost my virginity. The guy in question was not aware I was a virgin until after the event. I was just a tick in the box of his project to sleep with all of the first year girls in our course. If I had a do over I would have saved myself until I was dating the guy I was with for the remainder of my degree. He was a virgin until he hooked up with me. So perhaps having some experience made things better in the long run. 

2. Have you ever lived a moment in your life where you said "Yeh, I'm not going to ever tell anyone about that." Describe that moment or incident.Anyone who knows me well will know that it is impossible for me to keep anything to myself for too long. Jake and I have a strict 'tell all' policy so there are no secrets between us. This policy has taught me that most things that I think are embarrasing or shameful are really not that bad.  
3. Do you regret having acted on a sexual impulse? If yes, please describe.No. I honestly can't think of a time when I did something sexually that I regret. There are things that maybe I wouldn't do again but my philosophy is that it is OK to make mistakes as long as you learn from the experience.
4. Do you regret NOT having had sex with someone who you could have had sex with? If yes would you do it over and have sex?Yes and no. When I was much younger I was sleeping over at a friends house (I was about 20) and another friend of hers and I shared a bedroom. This friend started talking about how she wondered what it would be like to have sex with a girl, how it would feel etc etc. I was insanely curious about girls then but I totally missed the opportunity to explore this curiousity with this girl. It wasn't until I told my boyfriend later about it and he smacked me around the head (figuratively speaking of course!!) while telling me what an idiot I was for having missed an opportunity like that. I had to wait for another 15 years before I got that curiosity satisfied. If I met the same woman today I probably wouldn't but that is mainly becuase I am older and wiser and I get to scratch that itch often enough.


5. Do you regret not having asked or tried to hook up with someone you really liked out of fear of rejection only to later learn that person wanted you too? If yes, please describe.I once worked with a guy in the pre-Jake days that I had a massive crush on. I never acted on it because I thought he would laugh at me and I would lose face at work. I was never totally sure if he was interested but I suspect he was. I regretted my lack of action for a long time but I lost the regret as I got older and realised that things always turn out the way they are meant to. I am pretty sure that if I HAD made a move that I would have ended up just a notch on a bed post.
6. Do you regret having done a particular sex act? If yes please describe.See my answer to number 3.

Bonus: Do you regret not having told someone you love them? Romantic not, familial or friendship love.
The honest answer here is no. I don't have any long lost loves of my life hanging around in my closet so I can't give any juicy confessions.

2 comments:

  1. Woah! Like really? You can't remember the name of the person who took your virginity? Hmmn...Now ain't that something? As for me anyway, i sure as hell can remember.

    That Bloody Pervert
    thatbloodypervert.blogspot.com

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  2. Like Jake, I was not as sharp when it came to reading signals as I am today. I did all right, but missed out on several opportunities because I was so obtuse. Glad to hear I'm not the only one this happened to.

    Also, in regard to your answer to #5, good point about action precluding regret. There have been occasions in my past where a situation hasn't turned out the way I hoped it would but I can take solace in the fact that I did act and that's good enough.

    Gemma's philosophy that it is okay to make mistakes as long as you learn from them is admirable. It took me awhile to start learning from my mistakes, though I don't regret it as these questionable decisions led me to the life I have now.

    -Jack

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