I have been musing a lot recently about the definition of swinging. Instinctively I know that there is a difference between a committed couple opening their bedroom door to others and a few singles getting together for some group sex. I have read some stuff recently about singles in swinging and I am working on another piece that will go into my thoughts about this more fully. During the course of this last weekend a few things happened that gelled part of my feelings surrounding this topic.
Over the course of the weekend Jake and I were fortunate enough to have an encounter with that most rare of creatures, the unicorn. This is not our first encounter with this type of creature but we certainly don't count playing with an extra girl part of our regular fare. Consequently we were a little excited about this encounter. We have learned, over time that expectations and swinging do NOT, I repeat NOT go together well at all. And so we were relatively cool about the whole encounter. We didn't make elaborate plans and we didn't have long speculative discussions or anything like that. I had met and played briefly with the lady in question at a ladies only night that I attended but the first time Jake was to meet her was when she stepped out of her car in the driveway of our house.
He wasn't disappointed. Our completely unplanned, unstructured night went perfectly. Much hot sex was had with accompanying orgasms. The unicorn came complete with sensitive nipples that she LOVED people to play with and a pussy that was too beautiful for words. Jake was like the proverbial kid in a toy shop. It gave me a thrill to watch him be so excited about her body, It gave him a thrill to not only be involved with such an awesome body but also to see my excitement about his excitement and to cap it all off the unicorn got off on watching our excitement with each other. I posted a couple of weeks back a story based on watching your partner in an encounter. In the story I merely watched. In this encounter I was able to masturbate while watching and found the whole experience very hot.
Of course the whole night was not about watching. I did get to do some doing including doing Jake while I had a girl pressed against me and a whole lot of other very hot stuff. It was an amazing, sensual experience.
Threesomes are so much more intimate than foursomes in a lot of ways. Many times, just because of the nature of the dynamic a foursome turns into two sets of couples. The connection between the original couples becomes much weaker, eye contact is more difficult and less frequent and interaction with your spouse can distract you from your 'borrowed' partner.
I didn't experience any of that in this case. Jake and I were in very close contact for the whole of the night. This didn't mean that our guest was left out of things by any means. Of course she was an integral part of things. At one time she did think that we were communicating in some secret couple way that she wasn't privy to but this was not the case at all.
The next day was the usual horny fest that follows such a night. But this time there was something extra. We were not just a pair of rabbits but we were also like a pair of teenagers who had just discovered each other and were madly in love. It occurred to me that it was a little contradictory that I should feel so close to my husband the morning after I had shared him with another woman. Although that was only one aspect of what happened. He and I also shared her between us. Of course The Unicorn is her own person who is to be treated with respect and we took pains to ensure that she was included and cared for well but the aspect of sharing her and sharing such an intimate experience was as effective as any vanilla couple improvement technique known to man.
During the course of my day, today, I completed a survey being conducted as research into a book about unconventional relationships. One of the questions asked was "What benefits do you see your choice of lifestyle having on your relationship?" As weird as it sounds inviting other people into your beds can increase the intimacy between you. Group sex is a radical experience for anyone. Being able to indulge your bisexuality by having a man and a woman at the same time is something else altogether. But doing things like that as a shared activity with the person you love adds a completely different dimension.