I have been posting very sporadically for several months now and I dream of the day when I get my life balanced enough to regularly post here again. Until then TMI Tuesday is a way for me to keep in touch with the community so to speak.
This week's questions focus on relationships so here we go...
As always you can check out other TMI confessions at the TMI page.
1. What is the first thing that pops into your mind when you see an attractive person?
If it is a guy I generally wonder what he would look like naked. The second thing that pops into my head is what their cock would look like,
If it is a woman I generally wonder what their breasts look like.
2. What is your idea of a dream date? Describe the person and the type of date experience.
I am an old married lady so romantic style dates are not really anything that I even think about these days. These days my dating is more of a sexual encounter so my ideal date involves a few drinks, or a coffee, chatting, flirting, feeling each other up under the table and then finding somewhere a little more private to do whatever comes to mind.
3. How many serious relationships have you had? Were you in love?
It is hard to remember so far back in my life. After being together for sixteen years I can't remember another relationship other than the one I have with Jake. I guess I might have had one or two others. I was a very serious person back then so I am pretty sure that I thought I was in love with them at the time but it was nothing like what I have with Jake.
4. How many casual sexual relationships have you had?
Well I always say when people ask me questions like that that a lady never kisses and tells. Trying to seriously answer this question just raises a whole lot of other questions like, "What exactly as a casual relationship?" "Do one night stands count?", "Does meeting someone for coffee and then sucking their cock in a car count?",
The truth is that I don't have an exact answer. But the total number of people I have had sex with is somewhere between 10 and 100.
5. What will ruin a relationship for you?
Dishonesty. Once a person is dishonest with me I completely lose respect for them. It is probably number one relationship killer.
Bonus: What is your definition of sexy?
Sexy is not something that can really be defined. It is an attitude and confidence rather than a physical appearance. But like everything you can have too much of a good thing. Over confidence is just and unsexy as a lack of confidence. Sexy people are definitely comfortable in their own skin and comfortable with their faults as well as their positives.
1. We learn from our mistakes. What sex or sexual mistakes have you made and learned from, What was the lesson learned?
Since starting swinging I have learned many things from making mistakes. I think the main things that I have learned is communication is one of the most important things for a functional relationship monogamous or otherwise. I have experienced the consequences of not communicating in my own relationship and also the benefits of good communication. Sadly I have also witnessed the effects of bad communication on other relationships in the scene it is awkward to say the least to witness conflict between a couple at close quarters.
2. What risk (sexual or not) would you take if you knew you would not fail?
I just need to point out that if you knew you would not fail then it would not really be a risk. But in the spirit of the question I think the sexual risk that I would take would to be involved in a gang bang. I fantasise about this but it scares me a little to be the centre of attention of so many men. It could be a little overwhelming. On the other hand it could be a whole lot of fun, as long as it doesn't turn out something like this.
3. At what time in your life have you felt most passionate and alive?
My immediate answer to this question is right now. At this moment in time I am more at peace with the crap in my life than I have been ever before. Right not I have a job that is challenging and very stressful but at the same time extremely rewarding. Being in contact with young people constantly makes you see the world from a very different perspective and keeps you young.
4. What one piece of advice about sex would you offer the virgin you?
Your mother and the Catholic Church have got it wrong. Sex is not just for procreation and enjoying sex is something that God did intend you to do. Catholic guilt is an evil that needs to be eliminated from the world because it causes way to much anguish and unnecessary pain.
5. What are you avoiding?
Right now I am avoiding planning my work for the next couple of months. It is not absolutely essential that I do this planning but it is something that has the potential to make my life much much easier and also to significantly improve my performance. I just need to get motivated.
6. By what age should you know what you want to do with your life?
I don't think that there is any point when you should know exactly what you are going to do with the rest of your life. You may make a decision about what you want to do for the foreseeable future but as you grow and the world changes around you your priorities change and so you are never going to ever be really sure of what you are going to do with the rest of your life. Besides, I think that being in the same career for the forty or fifty years of your working life could be incredibly boring and limiting.
Bonus: Do you think you’ve experienced true intimacy in a relationship?
Yes I believe that I have that with Jake now. Most people dont believe me when I tell them that there are absolutely no secrets in our marraige. But there absolutely aren't. It has taken me time but I share everything with him, even the stuff that makes you squirm with embarrassment or the stuff that is icky. He hears it all and it makes us stronger.